Today has been another emotional roller coaster of a day. I am guessing that the next few weeks will be that way. Kate got put on the ventilator around 9 this morning. She was just struggling so hard to breathe so we knew it was what she needed. It was not an easy thing to think about. When I saw her for the first time on the vent it was really hard. The vent tube goes through the middle of her vocal cords so she is unable to cry or make any noise. It is hard to see her trying to cry but unable to. Since being on the vent she has done very well. It has allowed her to rest. Her respiratory rate is way down and she is not requiring as much oxygen. They also gave her a dose of surfactant which helps her lungs develop. She did great with that. Her weight today was 6 pounds 14 oz so she is holding steady which is awesome (as an RD I am a little obsessed with weight). So overall she is doing good now. We continue to pray that she will continue to remain stable so that she can begin to get better. We also continue to be so impressed with the NICU and the care that Kate is getting!!
After working in pediatrics for years it is a very different experience to be on this side of things. I do think both of working in a hospital has helped us to stay calm. The doctors and nurses have been great to explain things to us in medical terms and really make sure we know what is going on. I now wish I had paid more attention to vent settings when I was working with vent patients.
As far as mama I am doing good. I feel great. My recovery has been super easy and quick. It is so much easier than last time. I will be going home tomorrow so we will readjust our schedule to make it work once we go home.
Ben is doing great through all of this. He has not gotten to meet Kate so we are very eager to bring him home to her. I think one of the hardest things for me has been giving up on my perfect idea of how this experience was "supposed to be." I had all these great plans of having Ben and Kate meeting for the first time right after she was born. But I am learning truly what it means to leave it all in God's hands.
We really appreciate all the emails and messages we are getting from everyone. We have enjoyed visits today from friends and family. We feel so loved!!
I will update more later but for now here are some pictures...
The sweet sign over her bed